132 : Rejoice in the Weekend

I've always loved the weekends.  Who doesn't?  It's by far the best part of the week.  When I was married, I couldn't wait to go home Friday after work and just do NOTHING!  I liked spending time with my family.  My Ex and I would get our kids in bed and then we'd make dinner or order food, hang out, drink some wine, and just chill.  I loved the evening in almost more than the nights when we had plans because it was so nice to just come home after the long week.  And then everything happened and suddenly I found my Friday nights to be incredibly lonely.  The weekends I had my kids, I would get them in bed, then sit alone, fried from the week.  Sometimes I still followed the same steps as before (order food, drink wine, chill) but it wasn't the same as having someone around to enjoy it with.  The weekends I didn't have my kids were even worse, because I hated coming home to the empty house on Friday nights. Either way, life was now different.  I started to get adjusted to this fact, but often still found myself dreading the weekends at times- whether I had my kids or not.  It was challenging to be raising 2 kids alone, and it was even harder to be away from them.  And then the craziest thing happened.  I found myself last night actually looking forward to going home after work on Friday.  I had survived a very long week.  I was exhausted.  I had nothing planned for the night and I was looking forward to it.  I'm writing about this now because this was the first time that I can remember in a very long time that the thought of getting to the weekend didn't make me feel nervous or dreadful in any way.  I would go home, put my kids to bed and then just relax.  All by myself.  And I couldn't wait.