229 : He Likes Me

I had been asked out recently.  The guy was a good guy and we had several things in common.  He had recently gotten divorced and had a young child.  I didn't know the details of his story, but there was certainly something to the situation that felt familiar.  I liked him as a person.  I found him to be very easy going and I felt comfortable around him.  But still there was something that made me feel nervous at the thought of going out with him. I said yes when I was asked (I was going to be OPEN this year, dammit!)  but I felt a little uncertain about it and I couldn't pinpoint why.  I had been on a date already (see post #178) and I felt nervous then as well.  It would be weird if I wasn't nervous, right?  I had been married.  I had been with the same person for the past 6 years.  New and different sounded exciting in theory but it was also a little scary and intimidating.  I spent more time than I should've trying to understand what it was that made me feel uncertain with this situation in particular.  And then finally it hit me.  We had a lot in common.  We were both recently divorced and had young children.  This made me feel comfortable at the thought of him.  But this did not mean that we were right for each other.  By no means did it mean we were wrong for each other, either - that was still to be determined.  I guess I just didn't want to confuse my comfort level with someone knowing my situation, for a real legitimate connection.  Perhaps it would turn into that.  Perhaps it wouldn't.  I didn't need to know now.  I had identified what I wanted to be mindful and I would do so.  The rest would be figured out when it needed to be.