15 : Pray

As I already mentioned, I've never been a super religious person. Spiritual, yes but not a die hard. Growing up, ours was the family that went to mass every Sunday not like those Easter & Christmas Catholics (you know who you are). But as an adult, I had grown to be a little more lazy as far as my faith was concerned.  I did have both of my children baptized but beyond that, life just always seemed way too busy to make it to church on Sundays. I know how awful that sounds, but it was true. So here I was suddenly in this life altering situation and I felt lost.  Then one day, my dad gave his words of wisdom:  

Never underestimate the power of prayer. 

What did I have to lose at this point?  I mean, a little divine intervention couldn't hurt, right?  If there was ever a time I needed the Lord, that time was now.  At first I prayed that my marriage would be saved.  I prayed that my husband would find his way back to me.  I prayed that I would wake up the next day only to find that this whole situation was in fact just a nightmare and everything was back to normal.  Obviously, that didn't happen.  As time went on, I started to change my focus.  I began to pray for strength.  I began to pray for the ability to accept what was happening.  I began to pray that I could continue be my best self for my kids because that is what they deserved. And I prayed that my children would still grow up to be well adjusted people who knew how much they were loved despite the fact that their parents were not together.  I may not have prayed every day (and I still never made it to church - sorry dad) but I know that when I did say a prayer, it felt good.  And that was good enough for me.